Curt Smith: Family reunion is special time every summer

This missive comes during our 35th annual extended-family vacation on my wife’s side at this beautiful vacation spot.

Such a run allows some observations about changes during a long time span and how technology has improved our lives markedly, even as family dynamics remain much the same as the fifth generation experiences this tradition.

First, the context, then the observations. My wife, Debbie, grew up in Marion as part of the family business, Sutter’s Dairy, started by her grandfather. Her father and his four siblings/spouses worked in the business in the ’50s, ’60s and ’70s before changes in the industry led to consolidation.

So growing up, the company picnic was the family reunion. And that culture fostered the vacation tradition started by her parents.

The first gathering was in 1990, and the matriarch’s mother joined in that year. With a few exceptions, we have gathered annually since, with our numbers swelling to nearly 60 last year. This year, 43 relatives and spouses from Indiana, Ohio, Florida and beyond have gathered.

During those decades, we have lost the matriarch and her mother. One of the five siblings is gone, along with one of the grandchildren (our son). One beloved family member spent 18 years in prison but has rejoined us and attends faithfully.

There are 15 other grandchildren. Most with their own young families now, and 27 great-grandchildren (not all here this week).

The eldest great-grandchild is 22, so perhaps a sixth generation will grace us soon.

Such a span allows some observations. The bank where—to my recollection—I made my first ATM withdrawal in the early ’90s from an account not with that bank is here on this island. That building now stands empty, one of the few vacancies on this bustling spot.

While I once marveled at the ability to get some cash, today you can pay bills, deposit checks, monitor markets, make investments and engage in financial transactions almost as readily as if at home or in an office.

Keeping up with work has evolved similarly. Especially with the COVID push, Zoom calls, smartphones, cable news around the clock, super-fast internet, and powerful, portable devices make engaging in work nearly seamless for those not employed in public-facing professions. Those teachers, nurses, salespeople and more can check in, but work for them remains site-specific or face-to-face.

Travel is easier with GPS phones and text messages that make caravans super easy.

Those are but three examples of the changes making life easier. Also enriching our time together is the realization that family truly does come first for this extended clan, despite our differences.

Some are highly credentialed professionals; others are hourly, blue-collar workers. Some are older and traditional, some are younger and cutting-edge. The marriages have been amazingly stable in an age of divorce, a true countercultural trend.

Some are deeply committed to their faith, whether Protestant or Catholic Christianity. Others are agnostic or atheistic or New Age. Some are quiet introverts, others are boisterous extroverts.

But we all get along great and enjoy celebrating the commitment to family so well modeled by the prior generations. And now the time together has deep and rich traditions of its own that the new generations relish—pizza around the pool our first day together; outings to the nearby beach on a trolly run by the hotel association; warm evenings looking over the water listening to a local musician/comedian entertaining the crowds since before we started.

It is a magical and yet momentous thing we do each year. If you or your loved ones are in a position to catalyze or create such an event, I’d strongly encourage it. The rewards are virtually immeasurable. Having 20 cousins swimming in the same pool is awesome.•

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Smith is chairman of the Indiana Family Institute and author of “Deicide: Why Eliminating The Deity is Destroying America.” Send comments to ibjedit@ibj.com.

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