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Welcome to the alternate universe that is Indiana University football.
It is a very strange world we have happened upon. The College Football Playoff committee is deep in thought when it comes to team selection—the crème de la FBS—and an analyst on television is complaining that some SEC teams might be getting a raw deal. Poor Georgia, shafted in favor of … Indiana? The SEC has met the enemy, and it is in Bloomington? That’s like the Roman Empire suddenly under threat from Scotland.
In this universe, Indiana is all over the stat sheet of national leaders like a spilled cup of coffee—No. 1 in the country in rushing defense, No. 2 in scoring offense, No. 3 in total defense and pass efficiency. A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away—2023, namely—the Hoosiers were not first in the nation in rushing defense, but 80th. They were not second in scoring, but 104th.
In this universe, Indiana is picked to finish 17th out of 18 in the Big Ten Conference, then three months later is No. 5 in the nation—the most extraordinary dichotomy in college football. This while producing numbers that could melt an iPad. Points off turnovers: 73-10. Scoring margin in the first quarter: 94-13. Total touchdowns scored: 59-16. In this world, the Hoosiers—without a bowl victory for more than three decades—are one of the last three unbeatens. They owned as many wins by Nov. 9 as the past three seasons combined.
On this new planet, Michigan shows up in Bloomington and is a two-touchdown underdog. Near the gates are ticket scalpers who understand this is now a bull market. Ticket scalpers at Memorial Stadium. Curt Cignetti’s not the only guy making a killing on this fairy tale. Inside, the fans wave white towels by the thousands. Not white flags, but towels. The Hoosiers beat the Wolverines for only the third time since before man walked on the moon, and nobody is that happy because the 20-15 score comes with some mistakes. “I’m glad we won. I don’t like the way we played,” Cignetti will say when it is over.
In this universe, the basketball team is off and rolling at 3-0, and everyone applauds politely and declares, “Gee, that’s nice, but what are we going to do about the Ohio State quarterback?” The school, the boosters, the fans can’t throw money at football fast enough. “We’ve done a lot of good things. We have a lot of people behind us,” Cignetti will say.
So now here we are, when Indiana fans and the Big Ten and NASA can discover just how deeply into space this new galaxy actually stretches. You know what the old maps used to say, when reaching uncharted waters? Beyond this place, there be dragons.
For Indiana, beyond this place, there be Ohio State.
All those millennials and Gen Zers and Alphas born after Oct. 8, 1988, raise your hands. You weren’t alive the last time Indiana beat Ohio State in football. On that day, you could buy a gallon of gas for 96 cents, see a movie for $4, or splurge for one of these newfangled cellphones, which cost more than $2,000 and weighed a pound and a half.
The Soviet Union still existed, and the Berlin Wall stood. Indianapolis had hosted one Final Four. The Colts were in only their fifth season in Indy, and the Hoosier Dome was still almost new. Houston had the Oilers, not the Texans. Ronald Reagan was in the White House, and Hoosier Dan Quayle was running for vice president.
Since then, the Hoosiers and Buckeyes have played 31 times. Indiana has lost 30 and tied the other. Only three of the past 26 meetings have been decided by single figures. On the other hand, Ohio State won 17 of them by at least 20 points.
On this weekend a year ago, Indiana was losing at Purdue to finish 3-9. Meanwhile, a blossoming program from James Madison was crushing Coastal Carolina 56-14 to clinch the Sun Belt East. The coach in white and purple sat in front of his press conference afterward and said, “This was a major statement across the country. This was an exclamation point.”
It was also his last win at James Madison. That was Curt Cignetti, and now he’s in Bloomington along with a dozen or so of his players who joined in the transfer portal gusher toward Indiana. Twenty-seven players on the IU roster used to be someone else. Back in the old universe, Indiana fans were known to grouse about the downfall of college athletics with this crazy transfer portal. But not lately.
Fear Ohio State? None of these imports has lost to the Buckeyes for three decades nonstop. “Look, we’ve got a group of guys and coaches that have won 24 out of their last 25 games, so we don’t have a confidence problem,” Cignetti said this week.
He has picked up the national reputation of being something of an uber-confident sort, some would even suggest cocky. The amazing thing, of course, is that the outside world is noticing the football coach at Indiana at all, let alone going to the trouble of labeling him. He should certainly be Big Ten coach of the year. If Indiana is 11-0 by nightfall Nov. 23, he could be pope.
“We’ve put ourselves in a position right now to be talked about quite a bit,” he said. “That’s nice. It doesn’t help us prepare, doesn’t help us play any better. But we’ve got some great opportunities ahead of us.”
So the yellow brick road to Oz rolls on, and Columbus is the Emerald City. Ohio State mashed a Big Ten opponent 45-0. Hoosier fans might not have liked that score, except it was against Purdue. Now comes maybe the biggest game in the history of Indiana football. Also a most rare November when Ohio State has some cause to worry more about the Hoosiers than Michigan.
Toto, I don’t think we’re in Indiana anymore.•
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Lopresti is a lifelong resident of Richmond and a graduate of Ball State University. He was a columnist for USA Today and Gannett newspapers for 31 years; he covered 34 Final Fours, 30 Super Bowls, 32 World Series and 16 Olympics. He can be reached at mjl5853@aol.com.
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