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This column has been used to accomplish various goals over the last several years. This week I’m using it to provide just enough shame so that I more quickly change my behavior.
I’m a B- homeowner, at best. I mow my lawn just enough, likely to the dismay of my late grandpa. I mulch our landscaping beds when I see dirt. And my trim could use a fresh coat of paint, if not some new pieces. I’m not proud of my casual relationship with my dwelling, but competing priorities for my time and money have won time and time again.
For additional context, my home currently is the residence for me, my tolerant wife, a teenage daughter, a teenage son, and an imperialist squirrel who’s decided my attic is actually his attic, and he’ll do whatever he damn well pleases with it.
Like I said, this is some B- homeownership. Our home is clean but also on the verge of being the setting for a Pixar movie about a roundabout-dizzied squirrel who tries to convince a family of four that interspecies cohabitation isn’t that bad. It’s nuts.
The truth is, we all have elements of our life where we either excel or struggle to stay as disciplined as we like. My entire financial existence is buoyed by the rallying cry, “Make tomorrow easier,” yet somehow that same sensibility hasn’t assimilated into my tepid relationship with homeownership. I have a theory as to why; you might call it an excuse.
I know that I will live in my home at least six more years. At that time, my mortgage will be paid off, and my home will have doubled in value since I purchased it in 2007. These factors have convinced me that I can easily cover whatever deferred maintenance costs I incur when I sell the home. This is both true and stupid.
It’s precisely misguided because I don’t know what the future holds for me. Whereas I’m rather confident my financial life will consist of flexibility and optionality (what a passive-aggressive euphemism for wealth), my reluctance to stay fully current on maintenance is personally aggravating.
Therefore, it’s time to pay the piper. I recently hired a company to help me understand everything I need to do to my house. It’s been cathartic and eye-opening—and the shame has started to lift. And the craziest part? Catching up on some projects won’t cost me nearly as much money as I thought. More pragmatically, I think facing this blind spot head-on will prevent the problem from getting worse.
Why am I sharing this? First, I already told you: I’m bullying myself publicly. I think I need a therapist. And second, because we all have financial blind spots. Mine was home maintenance. Yours might be taxes, real estate, estate planning, college planning or even budgeting. Please learn from my realization that the big reveal isn’t nearly as bad as you’re fearing it will be.
Stop overthinking it. Stop accepting your B- (my parents are cackling right now due to the irony of my telling someone to stop accepting a B-). Just meet with a professional. Explain your situation. If they look at you confused like you have four noses, go meet with someone else. The right professional will know how to handle your situation, and they will put together a plan to get you headed in the right direction.
And just like everything else in life, there will be a cost. But it will pale in comparison to the cost of doing nothing. You will feel so good that you stepped up and took care of business. My favorite part is, this entire idea is age-agnostic: It’s never too late to address your blind spots.
We’ve evicted the squirrel, and now we’re off to the next item on our deferred maintenance checklist. Somehow, some way, this entire process has been a pleasure. I don’t believe my pleasure is directly linked to a relationship transition with a small woodland creature. Instead, deep down inside, I know I’ve addressed a deficiency. May you experience equal pleasures.•
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Dunn is CEO of Your Money Line powered by Pete the Planner, an employee-benefit organization focused on solving employees’ financial challenges. Email your financial questions to askpete@petetheplanner.com.
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If I only I could hire that company to help me manage my home, Pete! Thanks for giving Neighbor Serve a shot. I’m glad it’s gone well and I appreciate you sharing this story!